So I know said that I would start baking for this blog in May. My plan was to update every week. There is no proof, but I did actually start my baking in May. Unfortunately, things did not go as planned.
The first attempt was just bad news. I should have known from the start that things were not going to go well. I made the mistake of starting to make the batter before checking to see if had all of the ingredients I needed. Halfway through, I go to my refrigerator to get the eggs, and then I realize I don't have any eggs. Right now, I'm ready to kick myself. It was past 11:30 on a Sunday night; the only place open was 7-11. I didn't want to waste what I had already made so I went to get eggs. Not only did I have to go out at 11:30 on Sunday, but I had to pay way more than I should have for eggs.
By the time I got home, it was well past midnight. I continued right from where I left off. Now I go to get the vegetable oil and realize I don't have that either! So now I'm really pissed; there was no way in hell I was going back out. So I decide to improvise: olive oil it is!
Everything seemed fine to me now. I spoon the batter into the cupcake pans and pop them in the oven. While the cupcakes were baking I made the frosting. I was making a buttercream frosting: a very simple recipe. I have made this frosting a countless number of times. I was still worked up about the eggs and oil, so I wasn't paying attention to what I was doing. I poured in half a bag of powdered sugar (the amount the recipe calls for) and turned on the mixer. Next thing I know there is an explosion of white! I was covered in powdered sugar. It was in my hair and stuck in my eyelashes. I was so glad that I put on an apron. My kitchen was a wreck. Sugar was every where: down the cabinets, on the floor, on the counter, etc. It was seriously like a scene from a movie. The reason that the sugar attacked me was because I didn't add it gradually. I could not believe that I did that.
So I clean up really quick and salvage my frosting. By the time I finished, the cupcakes were done. So I took them out of the oven and put a few in the freezer so they would cool off quickly. While I'm waiting for these cupcakes to cool, I decide to sample one. I take a big bite out of one and then instantly spit it out. This cupcake was the WORST thing I have EVER tasted! It was so bad I couldn't bear to swallow it.
By now, my hopes were in the trash. I have 24 cupcakes that are not edible and I'm still covered in powdered sugar. I was determined to have a cupcake for my blog though. So I take out the stuff I need to decorate the cupcakes and get started. Once again, things did not go well. I wanted to make Cookie Monster cupcakes; they looked quite simple. So I start piping, but when I finish, it just looks like a huge blue ball of yarn. So I try again. This time there is so much frosting it starts to slide off the cupcake! Well, it turns out I was using the wrong icing tip.
At this time, I was covered in powdered sugar, my skin was dyed blue from the frosting color, and I had 21 undecorated cupcakes that taste like ass. So I cleaned up, threw out my cupcakes and called it a night.
Now, I am HIGHLY embarrassed that this happened because I consider myself a pretty good cook. Never have I ever had such a horrible experience before! Unfortunately for me, this would not be my last.
A week later I decided to dive back in. This time I was just making chocolate chip cookies. You know, the recipe on the back of Nestle Toll House Chocolate Chip packages. I've been making these by myself for 9 years. This shouldn't have been a problem. I creamed the butter and mixed in the sugars. I start to add the flour. While I was measuring out the flour, I got a phone call. I answer and have to take down a message. Then I return to adding flour to my mixture. So here I am thinking everything is going well. I sampled the dough and it tastes delicious and looks absolutely normal. After I dropped the dough on to some cookie sheets I place them in the oven and wait for them to be done.
Now you see, my mother (the most amazing baker I know) taught me how to cook. She always told me that you don't need a timer to know when your baked goods are done; you should know by how they look. These cookies take around 13 minutes to bake, right? So I'm keeping an eye on them, but after they've been in for 15 minutes they still don't look done. They are completely flat and look melted. Then all of sudden the look like they are burning on the edge, but they still haven't risen. I took them out of the oven. I taste them and they taste like butter. Then, realization struck. I didn't add enough flour! The phone call distracted me! No one will let me live that down.
So I sit here today, over a month later attempting to update my blog and I still have nothing. I wasn't going to mention any of this, but I was telling a close friend (you know who you are) all about my baking mishaps and she told me to blog about it. She said it was something she thought was absolutely hysterical and something she'd enjoy reading.
Now, I plan on changing the name of my blog from Good Day Cupcakes to The Diaries of a Cupcake Connoisseur. I plan on posting everything that happens in my cupcake baking experiences (no matter how embarrassing or stupid I am.) So I hope you all enjoy reading about my spaz-tastic moments.
Love always,
Natalie Shaver
